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Not really.
I’d disagree. The instant in “instant message” implies delivery, not response.
Do you always remember to set yourself “away” when you step away from the computer? I’d think it’s more rude to simply assume you can barge in on whatever the recipient is doing and expect them to drop everything and respond immediately.
As he said, if you need an immediate response, face-to-face or telephone is a more appropriate medium than instant messaging.