I heard that the safest way to answer to “greeting question” in USA is to say the same, e.g.:

-how are you -how are you

-god bless you -god bless you

and so on

Hey, i’m from Chile and it is not a privilege to be invited to someone’s 15 birthday party, and the party isn’t called “quinceanos”, it’s just a regular birthday party! I think you are mistaking Chile with Mexico, where the 15 birthday is really important.

Also, an extra fact: You are supposed to kiss in the cheek evey woman you say “hi” to (business or not)

I’m working for an american right now in Costa Rica and he keeps trying to impress our team with examples of how great the Army is and how he used to be so disciplilned and whatever while he was in the Army…

we don’t have an army and are actually quite proud of it. We don’t like war, and we don’t like violence. The whole gun-ho approach is really awful down here.

If you ever do business here, remember not to mention war, hunting deer or that sort of thing if you want to sound smart.

For those coming to America: smile. There is nothing more comforting and disarming in an unfamiliar situation to an American than a warm, toothy smile. People will forgive a myriad of slip-ups if followed by a smile (there are many kinds, so I suggest the innocent, self-mocking kind). However, also realize America has many subcultures, so this will not be universally true. In addition, humor and jokes are an excellent way to quickly make friends. Americans love to laugh. Likewise, for Americans going abroad: not everyone smiles. Do not be put off by the stoic public face of the French or the shy aversion of the eyes and mouth covering of the Japanese. Each place is going to have its own comedic customs.

Never schedule a meeting with a Frenchman right before a meeting with a German. You will be late, and the German will not be sympathetic. The inverse, a German before a Frenchman, is fine.

Not necessarily related to business, but one thing that always throws many of my non-American friends is the free use of first names, “even with people you’ve just met!” It’s not uncommon for them to go to the same accountant/doctor’s office/whatever for years and still refer to the people there as Mr. or Mrs. Whatever.

For what it’s worth the business card thing is so ingrained in Japanese culture that they make a show of it Stateside as well. Working on International Space Station hardware has certainly taught me this. :)

Additionally, it’s best to stay highly formal in conduct and correspondence with Japanese businessmen, who will lower the formality the more comfortable they become with you. Mr. Lastname is where you should start; my customers tend to progress to addressing me by first name after that, and then Morris-san after that [okay, I haven’t gotten to that level, but my boss has]. The formality thing is like dancing, and as the American, you’re following their lead.

I’ll never forget meeting a certain American woman for the first time. She was travelling and stayed a couple of nights in a meetinghouse in Stockholm, Sweden run by a little religious society of which she was a member back in America. My mother worked as a ‘warden’ of this place and so I was often there. One morning I came out of the private apartment my Mum had and the woman came out, looked at me and said, in English, ‘Who are you?’

I was so shocked I could barely answer. Maybe she was showing a genuine interest in me and who I was, but it came across as being incredibly rude. I was expecting her to introduce herself seeing as she was the guest, not demand that I do so first and in English.

I ate dinner with her later and was blindslided a couple more times that evening too —- ‘Why don’t you have a girlfriend?’

Oh a few occur…

In Ireland or the UK when a potential business partner complains of a hangover, US business people shouldn’t be worried about alcoholic tendencies, their EU partner is simply saying “I’m normal…”. That said, there may indeed be alcoholic tendencies…

The EU, private or public, is riddled with committees, so never expect to meet The Man, be prepared to present to The Group.

Italians love a good row. You’re normal if you squabble with them. Kick it back, they’ll kick back and smile. You’ve proven yourself as trustworthy.

Germans aren’t the only ones who hate hype, the Danes, the Swedes, most Northern EU states are ‘gimme the facts’ types.

I am told that in the central and south american countries, it is acceptable etiquette to place your sidearm on the table next to your service and discretely cover it with a napkin. I find this custom very comforting, allowing the loosening of the gunbelt without concern for fumbling should the flag go up. A corner seat in any third world restaurant is always recommended.

In Japan, business cards are offered and accepted with two hands.

In the region of Northern California know as “Silicon Valley,” it is a custom for males in the technology industry to dress far younger than their age — t-shirts and short trousers often suffice in the workplace. Workers will often play with toys during business meetings, pretending to pay attention while fiddling with mobile devices, laptop computers, or even hand-held video games. It is not expected to make eye contact, participate in basic social skills, or even refer to colleagues by anything other than the familiar “dude.” Strange customs, indeed.

Great post.

In China (as in much of Asia) the business card is considered almost an embodiment of the person on it so one must be sure to treat it accordingly. Also, be on time.

Look, there is a certain conceit to people specializing in cross-cultural communications that their knowledge is necessary to avoid offending someone in a culture you are visiting. These tidbits are interesting, and sure it’s better to know them than not, but as someone who has served as an interpreter (Japanese-English) for a ton of cross-cultural business meetings, this is all blown out of proportion.

People Americans are doing business with are not stupid, and they know that people from outside of their own culture do things differently. Therefore, they cut people from other cultures lots of slack. Americans do the same thing when people from other cultures come to America for business meetings.

People involved in international business are all very flexible when it comes to these things. Cross-cultural communications specialists hype these issues to sell their services.

For Britons in the US: when you say ‘thank you’ to an American, especially in the south, he/she may reply with a nasal ‘uh-huh’, your gut reaction will be either to feel offended or ask what was just said. This is a difficult instinct to override.

The time thing is pretty important; generally being late is a very bad idea in Switzerland or Germany, or in Japan for that matter (the three places I’m most familiar with)

Beyond that though…people don’t really look at the surface details of etiquette that much. The “ugly Americans” that are remembered are the ones who are pushy, aggressive, arrogant, etc… Generally if you are laid back, polite, and put away the attitude that America is the best and the rest of the world sucks, you do ok. Oh, and avoid talking about politics :)

Being able to speak the language of your counterpart is highly appreciated. Or at least, to be able to mumble basic words such as ‘hello’, ‘please’, ‘thank you’ in your host’s language always earns you points.

One must be careful with these tidbits as they can easily transmogrify, as Calvin would say, into STEREOTYPES. Respect is #1. After that, one simply must be observant and careful until one feels more at ease with their knowledge of local customs.

This may seem hilarious to you.

During my first stay in the US in the middle of the nineties, I was overwhelmed by the hospitality of all these people I met. Everybody seemed to be interested in my health and my mood.

You see, even strangers asked me ”How are you?” or ”How are you doing?”. But as I started to explain that ”A little sleepy, thank you, but I feel the jet lag fading away by now …” they looked at me in confusion or just ignored me and went on with their business.

I quickly ealised that the only answer they expected was ”Fine, thank you”.

Not necessarily business related: In England (and other parts as well), when riding an escalator, be sure to stand on the right to let others pass on the left. People will get really pissed at you if you don’t do this. In fact, after spending a few months there I get pissed at people in the states who stupidly take up the whole step, or stand on the left while everyone else stands on the right.

Not necessarily business related: Riding an escalator - In Malaysia & Singapore, you should stand on the left instead and let people pass you on the right. Probably due to the fact that we drive on the left side, and right is used for overtaking.

i find that english escalator custom funny — thanks for that comment! it’s the same here in vienna — stand on the right side, walk on the left side is mandated on the subway, people saw how much sense this makes, and the practice spread to other places like shopping malls. in other austrian cities it’s not common at all though. so why do i personally find it funny? because i always thought (basically arbitrary) choice of sides has been made because you always overtake on the left side in traffic, thus i would have expected britons to do the reverse.

ad olle bergman’s comment: do north americans (AFAIK the practice isn’t confined to US citizens) really expect an answer to “how are you?”? of course it’s weird to use a rethorical question as a greeting, but then greetings often are weird. (in austria, people routinely use “may god protect/bless you” as a form of “good day”/”hello”, but they never use it as “goodbye”.) so, i could definitely live with that. OTOH, asking “how are you?” and expecting an answer of “fine, thanks” is positively hypocritical. please please only do this when you’re really sure you won’t cause confusion.

PS: the live preview feature for comments works perfectly now in firefox; thanks, merlin!

[…] For instance, if you’re served something you don’t like, you’ll need to figure out a way to choke it down so you don’t offend your hosts (just like Willie in the Temple of Doom, but hopefully you won’t be served monkey brains). This is a must-read for anyone who’s planning on making a trip out of their native land. — Wendy Boswell Intl. Business: How not to be the “ugly American” [43 Folders] […]

I agree with Maki: being pushy and arrogant is the real faux-pas.

In Brazil, do not use the “ok” hand sign, it’s the local equivalent of giving someone the finger. And if you decide to speak Spanish because it’s “oh so close to Portuguese” (and sometimes it’s not), make it completely clear that you know Spanish is NOT the local language, so you do not come off as the ignorant American.

I think the most important thing is attitude. If you travel with the spirit of adventure, a desire to learn about the people and place and a willingness to try new things and embrace the discomfort, you will be welcome anywhere. Ugly American stories usually stem from us not doing these things and acting a fool overseas.

Fist in the open palm means fight in Chile And that open palm thing is very stupid. Doesnt mean a shit.

Stand on the right, walk on the left on the escalators? That’s not just overseas, kids - if you stand on the left on an escalator in the Metro system in Washington, D.C., you will experience the wrath of the commuters. Especially during rush hour, but you can get grumbled/yelled at in off hours, too. (Sorry - we’re in a hurry! The darn trains don’t come that often!)

In many European and other French-speaking countries, it is the custom to greet someone with kisses on the cheek — these are really more air-kisses delivered while your cheek is near theirs, and not really on the cheek. In Belgium, you do left-right-left, whereas in many other countries it’s just one side or the other, or both sides (but in a particular order).

Having lived in Belgium for nearly eight years, and traveled to a number of other countries, I can tell you that it is very important to at least make an honest attempt to speak the local language, even if that is saying nothing more than “Hello, I don’t speak , do you speak English?” Exact pronunciation would be good, but just making an honest effort is appreciated. Speaking just a few words of the local language will get you a long way — pay attention to those short language sections in the back of most travel books.

In Thailand and Singapore, you never use just one hand to give or accept something from someone else — you always use both hands, and show respect for the object being given or accepted, so don’t just casually put it in your pocket (or whatever). You should also at least nod towards the person as you are giving or accepting the object. This could be a receipt for something you have bought, a tip to the skycap, or whatever. You should also bow or at least nod towards a person when greeting them, saying goodbye, saying thank you, etc….

Also, shoes inside a residence, home, or hotel room are frowned upon — every single local I ever met over there would take their shoes off the moment they came through the door. I believe that this practice is common in Japan, too.

Many languages will have different words or word usage based on what they consider to be the gender of the word, or the gender of the person being referenced. For example, La Pluma (the pen) versus El Gato (the cat) in Spanish. In Thailand, different words are used to say “thank you”, depending on whether you are talking to a woman or a man.

In general, try to show respect to the locals, their language, the customs, and they will usually be pleasantly surprised and show you respect in turn.

Sigh….

For “Hello, I don’t speak , do you speak English?”, that should have been something more like “Hello, I don’t speak insert-local-language-here, do you speak English?”

Oh, and in English speaking countries, keep a careful eye out for differing meanings for the same words. In the US, we use the word “pants” to describe what people in the UK would call “trousers”. In the UK, they use the word “pants” to describe what we would call “underwear”. In the US, we say “suspenders”, when those in the UK would say “braces”. In the UK, if they say “suspenders”, the equivalent American word would be “garter”.

There’s a similar issue for many foreign languages. In French, there’s even a term for this — Faux Ami (pronounced something like “Foze Ah-mee”). In English, we might use the word “legume” to mean particular varieties of peas or beans, while in French this word simply means “vegetables”. There are lots of these in French. I’m sure the same is true for many other languages.

Oh, and for anyone traveling to Europe, they’re not “French Fries”. The French didn’t invent them — the Belgians did. In France, they’re usually called “Frites Belge” (pronounced something like “Freet Belj”), “Pommes Frites” (pronounced “Pom Freet”), or just plain “Frites”. In Germany, I’ve usually heard them called “Pommes Frites”, even though that’s a French phrase.

In Europe, if you call them “French Fries”, you’re just demonstrating that you really are the stereotypical ignorant American. And don’t get me started on the term “Freedom Fries”.

Translation: Pommes = Potatoes Frites = Fried Belge = Belgian

Something I often see other North American travellers do is complain about small things that aren’t the same as at home.It is always best to smile and live with it. Complaining won’t change a thing, and can make things worse.

No matter what the situation, when asked about something to do with the country or people, I always tell the person(s) that the country is great, and that is because of its wonderful people. Smile with your eyes, because then it is believable. Think about it for one minute. Were you to meet a foreigner in your own country and should they complain about things you take for granted as being that way, you quickly get a disdain for that person… not a good start, but a good end, to any type of relationship or meeting.

Overall, I suggest accepting things as they are and actually enjoying them as they are. Eating goat knuckles to insects to whatever might not be appealing, but is something you wont forget, one of those great memories to look back on. I often disappear alone to places no North American would normally go, and do just fine because I am genuine, humble, and smile alot, and (If you are somewhere dangerous, do not make eye contact. It makes it much easier to not be seen) know when I can relax or not. Always listen to your sixth sense. It never lies.