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What does your inbox say about you?
Merlin Mann | Aug 14 2006
Salt Lake Tribune - Your e-mail inbox is a metaphor for your life Jeffrey Zaslow rang me up a while back for a quote that made it into his WSJ article (mirrored many places, including here) on what your email style says about you, your habits, and your “mental health.” It’s a fun piece, and I was happy to contribute, but I’m not altogether on-board with the thesis. There’s probably some truth to the idea that people’s email styles reflect aspects of their personalities to some extent (filers might be more organized; procrastinators tend to let stuff pile up), but in my experience, things like email or even whole online personas aren’t a reliable indicator of what people are really like in person or how they behave in (for lack of a better phrase) “the real world.” Some of the most articulate people I know sound like complete imbeciles in email. I’ve also known garden-variety dullards who, given adequate time and spell check functionality, can come off like Thomas Mann. And, frankly, some of the busiest and most seemingly productive people I know actually ignore all electronic communication until someone calls them on the phone. Does it track? Meh. Not in my experience. Slightly related, just the other day, I had the pleasure of meeting John Gruber (a longtime hero of mine) and was delighted to realize that he is neither The Comic Book Guy nor a Wallace Shawn character, as I’d always unconsciously imagined. He’s hilarious and relaxed and — at the risk of blowing his tough-guy, dark-grey cover — completely charming. I mean he’s a guy, not a web site, you know? Similarly, you aren’t necessarily your inbox nor the way you use it. Thank God. Not too much of a life-changing point to make here. I like whacky pop psychology conjecture as much as the next guy, but I’ve learned not to draw too many conclusions about people based on a data point as fickle and weird as electronic communication. I’m just not sure email habits can reliably tell you more about a whole person than their bowling average, their choice of hair products, or the results of any given online personality test. More importantly, I think many of us couldn’t have ever predicted how email would demand so much attention in our lives. So most of us are still having a hell of a time figuring our how to give it exactly as much attention as it deserves. As that process evolves, we try on different habits and sometimes eat the booger. Fortunately, we can always change and adapt and even try to develop a style that does mirror our time and values in a way that suits our personalities. Or maybe not. Frankly, I don’t know. What do you think? What can you tell about someone by how they handle email? 18 Comments
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![]() I agree with what Marc...Submitted by Scott Howard (not verified) on August 15, 2006 - 3:40am.
I agree with what Marc said, my email definately shows how quick I respond to things in my life. I usually respond within a few hours of getting an email. I think that email does reflect alot of the lifestyles that people have. »
![]() [...] Merlin asks ‘what does...Submitted by Smartest Marketing Secrets » Speedlinking - 16 August (not verified) on August 15, 2006 - 3:47am.
[…] Merlin asks ‘what does your inbox say about you?’ - My inbox says I’m a mess […] »
![]() [...] What does your inbox...Submitted by tasneem khalil » 360° - 15/8 2006 (not verified) on August 14, 2006 - 9:04pm.
[…] What does your inbox say about you? […] »
![]() Mine says I am obsessive...Submitted by Paul (not verified) on August 14, 2006 - 8:55am.
Mine says I am obsessive (keep everything) and that I change identities and disappear, leaving my whole identity behind every few weeks (dumping everything into the ‘e-mail DMZ’). »
![]() My inbox doesn't say anything...Submitted by Leo (not verified) on August 14, 2006 - 12:31pm.
My inbox doesn’t say anything about me … at least not anymore. When I caught it talking about me to other people those two times, I got mad at it and gave it a good slapping. Now it receives an electric shock if it talks about me. You only talk to ME, Inbox! »
![]() [...] via 43 FOLDERS ...Submitted by Your Email and the Life You Live : SKIRMISHER (not verified) on August 14, 2006 - 5:13pm.
[…] via 43 FOLDERS EMail This Post to a Friend […] »
![]() One thing I've noticed quite...Submitted by Neil (not verified) on August 14, 2006 - 6:19pm.
One thing I’ve noticed quite a bit is that people who write abrupt, almost curt emails often end up being the most chatty, gregarious people in person. In other words, I don’t think it’s the tidiness of one’s inbox that’s telling: it’s the content of the sent box. If anything is an indication of personality w/r/t email it’s that people who write horrendously misspelled missives chock-a-block full of grammatical errors tend to be similarly dishevelled in person. Then again, I’m probably talking out of my hat in a big way here. Empirical evidence? Nah. »
![]() I think how you organize...Submitted by Wes (not verified) on August 14, 2006 - 6:47am.
I think how you organize your inbox, and on a larger scale, how you organize your computer files, is a reflection of your internal information organization. This would be an important component affecting how one behaves in the real world. But not the only factor. The style/content of messages probably is more an accurate reflection of my mental state at the moment. Also, I have to believe that one can change something fundamental as how we organize our lives internally. At least, I hope I am “evolving”. Just as GTD has allowed to me relax somewhat about things I need to do, improving desktop search programs have decreased my need to meticulously categorize every file. »
![]() There are inboxes and then...Submitted by MadScott (not verified) on August 17, 2006 - 11:07pm.
There are inboxes and then there are inboxes… I’m the ultimate Email “hoarder” — I’ve kept every non-spam email I’ve gotten since 1995. Really. This is necessary when working in an ill-defined academic environment, where an Email may be necessary for reference later (or for the nonstop infighting that goes on — this has saved my career on more than one occasion). Does this mean that I read or use everything in my “in” box? Of course not — I have a separate “action” box that I transfer the really important stuff to (perhaps one or two items a day, finally). This is sorted by date — if it’s there for more than a week, then it’s expedited or renegotiated (“Can I have an extension on this?”). This allows me to have a clear view of what’s immediately important versus the endless dribble of informational Emails that come in. »
![]() Good articles. Not sure, how...Submitted by Didi Suprapta (not verified) on August 14, 2006 - 3:27am.
Good articles. Not sure, how people can know more about me from my email address »
About Merlin MannBio Merlin Mann is an independent writer, speaker, and broadcaster. He’s best known for being the guy who started the website you’re reading right now. He lives in San Francisco, does lots of public speaking, and helps make cool things like You Look Nice Today. Also? He looks like this, answers questions, and has something like a life. Merlin’s favorite thing he’s written recently is a short essay called, “Better.” |
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